These are several uncomfortable situations that I have found myself in with clients, and resolutions that I have figured out myself. I do hope that this helps any therapist out there with similar issues. In times like these it’s good to be prepared with lists like this.
1) Situation: They keep messing with the draping or pulling it up to far.
Response: The next time they do that, simply put your hand on the sheet to prevent it from being moved further and say, “Oh I’ll handle the draping, you just relax.”
*Sometimes men won’t always get under the sheets/blankets like they’re supposed to. So, simply walk in with an extra sheet or keep one on hand in the massage room. You don’t need to say anything or acknowledge the fact, just putting it on them should get the point across.
2) Situation: Making themselves get excited-talking too much.
Response: Comment that you have found some tension on the area that you are working on. Then, ask them to participate in a breathing exercise that has them (silently) count down from ten in their heads. After they’ve been silent for awhile (and consequentially more relaxed), comment on how much better the muscle feels. If they start yapping again, magically find some more tension and repeat.
*When all else fails, move on to facial massage.
3) Situation: Client is stuck in a negative cycle of bitching. It is bringing you down, and making them grow tense.
Response: “Gosh that sounds awful. Well I’m glad you made it in here today b/c it sounds like you could use some stress relief. So you just clear your mind of all of that negative stuff and breathe in the positive.” I know that sounds a little corny, but laying it all out there can really help them realize that this is their time, and they don’t need to share it with anxiety about a certain situation. Ofcourse if all else fails, simply say, “Yah know that really sounds depressing. It’s kind of bringing me down so let’s stick to a positive topic. I don’t want you to feel any more stress, it is your time.” This is just a basic idea for a response, but a similar format to this is a good idea. Notice that when I use the word “let’s” it sounds less personal and more team-oriented. In other words, it makes them less defensive.
4) Client constantly tenses up their muscles.
Response: I have, unfortunately, taken up the habit of telling clients to “play dead”. Perhaps this is not the best choice in words. Saying something along the lines of “Just let your head/arm/neck fall into my hands,” or “I want you to pretend that your muscles are made of jell-o,” sounds much better than “Just relax.” Then, lighten up on pressure slightly and increase it much more gradually.
5) Client is way too loud.
Response: Lower your own voice to an extreme yet audible degree. The disparity between volumes should make the loudness of their own voice more obvious to them. If that doesn’t work whisper/say, “I’m sorry to ask but could you tone your volume down just a little bit? These walls are so thin- it’s ridiculous.” The old blame-the-wall trick never fails.
6) Hugging/ kissing attempts
Response: If it occurs to you even once that this person is just seeing how far they can go with you then drop them as a client. If they call and request you then the front desk can make up some excuse as to why you will no longer work with them but that is not a situation that you want to be around.
Otherwise, when they ask you how your day is you can reply with something like “It’s been great, except for this one guy that kept trying to hug me. I mean I know some people are comfortable with that, I’m just not one of them.” If you say this really casually, then they won’t take it personally. At the end of the session if they start to go in for a hug just put your hand out, palm forward, in front of you and say (with a friendly, forgiving smile) “I’m not much of a hugger actually.” If you are uncomfortable with being that direct, simply put your hand out as mentioned before and stage a fake sneeze. “It’s probably just allergies, but just in case…”
7) Asking for phone number
Response: Explain to him that all scheduling is done through the front desk. Stick with that but if he persists then just pass the front desk number (one that is not advertised) on as your own. This will shut him up and get your point across when he eventually calls.
I hope this helps out and there will be more to come!
